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Christmas In A Stepdad’s Shoes

Dai WoolridgeDai Woolridge4 minute readNovember/December 2020, page 16

When it comes to the Christmas story, we find the most earth shattering, mind bending, cosmically consuming story imaginable – where the divine enters the dirt, where hope has a heartbeat and enters the world. Creation has been waiting with bated breath for this moment. Ever since God promised in Genesis 3:15 that a serpent crushing seed would one day come from man and reframe the story.

But maybe we have become over familiar with the story?

Does the reality of the good news of Jesus really land?

Or do we disengage with the message and let it bypass the heart?

Maybe we read the beginning of Matthew or Luke but we’re just on auto-pilot mode? In film, there’s a term called ‘cut to the chase’. It’s a turn of phrase that’s made its way into popular culture. Initially it referred to a high speed car chase scene – and to use it in context meant something like, ‘I think we’ve got enough of the falling in love part, it’s boring, let’s cut to the exciting stuff!’

Do we do something similar with the Christmas story? Do we ‘cut to the chase’, skim read or skip parts of the nativity like a Netflix recap because we think we know the long and short of it? I’m not passing judgement here – it’s a challenge to myself first and foremost. I never want the glorious truth behind the story of Jesus’ birth to bypass the heart, I want it to land, to sink in.

So the question becomes, how do we re-engage with an over-familiar story both faithfully and freshly?

Joseph’s story

‘I don’t believe it.

I just can’t

‘cos if it means what I think it does

She’s broken my heart.’

(Extract from Joseph spoken word)

A few years ago I created a poem from Joseph’s perspective on the story of Christmas. He fascinated me. Reading the beginning of Matthew, it’s obvious he was a godly man of integrity, but I wanted to read between the verses and to put myself in Joseph’s shoes. Maybe sometimes we treat Bible characters with such veneration that we fail to connect with their humanity and I felt there was so much I could learn from Joseph, by seeing the story from his perspective.

In Matthew 1:19, we read that Joseph… ‘had in mind to divorce Mary quietly.’ It can be so easy to ‘cut to the chase’ here and skip to the shepherds or ‘the stable bit’, but let’s just take a pit stop for a moment.

There’s two words that jump out at me – the first is ‘divorce’.

It’s different to how we would understand it today because at this point they were not yet married. Joseph was engaged to Mary, but in the Jewish culture of the time getting engaged was more official than just updating your relationship status on Facebook! It was a promise made that one day he will marry, be united and become ‘one flesh’ with the love of his life. To break off the engagement required a divorce.

Let’s set the scene. It’s after angel Gabriel’s meeting with Mary. Now imagine being Joseph when Mary broke the news? Imagine seeing the woman you loved and trusted more than anyone else has somehow got herself pregnant and you knew full well you weren’t the dad!

‘You’ve got a baby bump showing through your clothes

that now are too tight!

How could you do this?

We made a vow not to go there till the wedding night!’

(Extract from Joseph spoken word)

Imagine if your fiancée told you that the reason she was pregnant was because the Holy Spirit supernaturally impregnated her with God’s son, who would go on to establish David’s kingdom forever. Hmm…my guess is the most godly and understanding guy on the planet would need to take five for some thinking time!

‘So you’re giving birth to God’s chosen son?

This bun in your oven then…

He is the one??

As in the one who will reign for all of time?

Mary, uhm…have you been drinking too much wine?!’

(Extract from Joseph spoken word)

The fact that the text says Joseph planned to ‘divorce’ Mary meant he obviously didn’t buy her side of the story. It’s not a stretch to conclude that he was a heartbroken man, because he thought the love of his life was having an affair and lying about it through her teeth…(In this moment, you can’t blame him for wanting to call quits…I just wish I could put an arm around his shoulder and tell him it’s all going to work out just fine!)

‘Why did she do this?

I don’t need this grief

I don’t want a divorce

But it’s the only course

Left for me.

The wedding’s off

She’s had an affair

You don’t believe me, the proof’s right there

But although it’s fair,

I won’t make it public

I won’t cause a scene’

(Extract from Joseph spoken word)

The second word I pick up on is ‘quietly’. He was planning to call it off, but he was planning to do it on the quiet. This jumps out of the page for me because although he was heartbroken, he didn’t want to drag Mary’s name through the mud. He felt let down but he still loved her. It’s important to note that Joseph wasn’t perfect, but he was a man of integrity, even when it hurt. I think that’s one reason why God appointed Joseph to be the stepdad to the Saviour of the world.

‘Then later that night

I had this dream

An angel turned up, said

“Mary’s record’s clean.”’

(Extract from Joseph spoken word)

If you read on, you know Joseph has a change of heart when an angel corroborates Mary’s story in a dream. It’s a game changing moment as God gives Joseph the good news first hand. And to be straight here – the good news isn’t that Mary was simply telling the truth, but rather the significance of the truth she was telling. Why? Because it meant that ‘the serpent crusher’, the handpicked anointed one was forming in the womb of his soon to be wife. The angel tells Joseph to marry Mary because she was going to give birth to God in the flesh, Immanuel – God with us. This was not just a game changing moment for Mary and Joseph – this was a game changing moment which would bring hope for humanity.

Now imagine being Joseph when that penny dropped. Imagine being Joseph when that truth landed.

‘And when I remember his humble birth

The penny drops of why he came to this earth

The embodiment of God in skin and bone

My stepson will live amongst us so we’ll never be alone’

(Extract from Joseph spoken word)

Let’s not allow the story of Christmas to bypass our heart. May we dive in headfirst. May we be like Joseph and let the reality of Jesus’ arrival, arrive in our hearts; again and again and again.

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About the author

Dai Woolridge
Dai Woolridge is a poet, author, storyteller and spoken word artist. He is passionate about communicating Jesus through creativity and words and is creative specialist for the Bible Society and heads up Spoken-Truth.com.

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